20 Days Till Heaven…Day 14 – Find Someone, Freddy K, and Guilt Trip

October 29, 2017 Michael Weese Comments 0 Comment

20 Days Till Heaven…Day 14 – Find Someone, Freddy K, and Guilt Trip

Memories from October 29th, 2016 – Day 14

So today would start what I guess you could say was our last full weekend together. It feels crazy to even type that out, but it was exactly that. She wasn’t feeling terrible this day, but you could say she was tired. I remember it all fairly well by looking at some of the things that we did and talked about this day. Overall it was a day in bed for her, just catching up on some rest while I kept up with the kids downstairs.

She woke up asking for a Pepsi. I am guessing for some of the caffeine, sugar, and calories. At one point the doctors told us since she wasn’t eating well she needed to at a minimum focus on getting some calories. I took her up a Pepsi which was also my favorite drink of choice, some water, and some crackers. I checked back in on her a few minutes later to see if she was still up and had attempted to eat them or not.

I always told Kate that she was the only person that understood me. Even if she didn’t, she did a pretty good job at showing that she at least cared. I understand that’s a very general statement, but we all have that one person that really gets who you are and the things that you say. Mine just happened to be my wife, or at least we grew to that point.

Now what comes next was something that she had brought up several times before. I didn’t like to entertain it and I didn’t like hearing her bring it up. It’s a little tough to hear someone that you are in love with talk about this. Plain and simple I had my mind made up on how I felt at the time. The last time she brought this up was in April. I was happy, I have the kids, a home, what had grown to be a perfect marriage, and again I was happy.

The conversation was about moving on after her.

She starts off by already making it clear that she knows my stance on the subject when she says “I know you say no, but…” I guess she wanted to try to have the talk one more time.

A little while she just sent me a picture. She was so pretty and strong wasn’t she? 🙂

A little time passes and she brings back up the conversation that I thought I had avoided. There was one thing that she said in this message that I will say pushed me in the direction to hear what she had to say. It made me realize that maybe we should have this talk and at least open up to hear what she has to say. It’s when she said, “We will always have what we have together, nothing will change that.”

After all, like I said before, if anyone knew me it was her. Maybe she knew me better than I knew myself.

Around 10:30am I have only one recorded call for the day. I would ask her to please work on the cards that we had picked up for the kids if she had the energy. We had been procrastinating, and we were not getting them done. Like I said before, it’s one idea that I loved and didn’t want to miss out on the chance to do it for them.

She sent me a message a little while later expressing some love and asking for her medicine.

Here is one of those big gaps that are usually unaccounted for. Not sure what happened once again, but I do remember one thing. Maybe there were some visitors since it was a Saturday, I don’t remember. I do however remember that Regan had a Halloween party this night and she wanted to be Freddy Krueger. Not just a regular Freddy Krueger, but one with a full latex mask that we would have to make ourselves.

Four hours long of applying liquid latex for fake cuts and sores, Kate doing her make-up magic, we came up with this. I would drop Regan off to the party for the night.

Later in the night she put Grantley to bed and said his prayers with him. She would do this as long as she could. I was on my way home from taking care of some things after dropping Regan off. She sent me a message letting me know that he was calling for her from his room across the hall.

I told her that I would take care of it as soon as I got home, but not after a little friendly guilt trip.

Another day in the books and a memorable one for the reasons above. If you remember above, I asked her if we could talk later about what she had wanted to discuss. The conversation that took place that night was probably one of the best gifts that she had ever given me. I’m not ready to talk about it yet, but maybe worthy of a future post all by itself. She would expect me to keep things moving, not because we wouldn’t be able to love each other anymore, but because of the love that we did have. Think about that one for a while.

“The terrible thing about love is that it takes away your safety net, your balancing pole. Even the tightrope you walk upon will disappear beneath you, yet love expects you to keep walking anyway, arms outstretched, one foot after the other, on nothing more than air.”
― Christopher Barzak

-Mindset Matters

Day 1 – I’LL TRY NOT TO SCARE YOU AND YELLOW CHEESE

Day 2 – DO YOU KISS ME, CO-PAYS, PINTEREST, AND SCANS

Day 3 – I GET TO BE HAPPY NOW, THIS IS A POSITIVE THING

Day 4 – SHARE THE NEWS, HAPPY DWARF, AND PEOPLE ARE AWESOME

Day 5 – FIELD TRIP, DELICIOUS FLOWER BOUQUET, AND LAST PICTURE

Day 6 – DISNEY SMELLS, NURSE, AND SLEEPOVER

Day 7 – CONFESSIONS, CARDS AND JOURNALS

Day 8 – PIGGYBACKS, CHEER SUPPORT, VISITS, AND ITALIAN WEDDING SOUP

Day 9 – SPREADING GERMS, CINNAMON TOAST, AND LILLY PULITZER

Day 10 – IF YOU HAVE A BAD DAY…PRAY

Day 11 – SETTING THE STAGE, URN EMOJI, AND CHECK YOURSELF